People like blood sausage too...

...People are morons.  So goes the saying in Groundhog Day (aside: I swear I like more TV shows and movies than just Seinfeld, Airplane and Groundhog Day - they just have so many quotable moments and for some reason I've been stuck on them lately, I'll evolve).  I typically don't like to cannibalize the attention on my own blog posts by posting twice in the same day, let alone 2 hours, but seeing as how I don't have a lot of readers to piss off, now is probably the time to make mistakes.

I couldn't help but notice when I went to Yahoo's home page (I know, I know, it's my own fault, and I need to break the habit of visiting Yahoo) that their top news, yet again, is that another moron has fallen victim to his own stupidity.  AKA - he racked up an $11,000 cell phone bill.  I didn't bother to read the rest of the article, because it doesn't deserve more attention than the time it took to read the headline and look at the picture, which really say it all (I'll refrain from including the fact that he's Canadian, since this has happened to many Americans).

You need only Google "really expensive cell phone bill" to come up with hundreds of similar stories.  Now, I don't have kids, so I only have my own cell phone usage to police, but it seems pretty common sense - if I am roaming, I probably should not start streaming videos or making ridiculously long phone calls or sending 5000 text messages a minute.

Typically I don't defend big businesses like the phone company and they should probably give these idiots a break, but just as with blood sausage, the problem will exist until the idiots are eliminated (read: never).  What bothers me even more about this is that there are probably even more people out there that have received cell phone bills like this one and don't report it because of the sheer embarassment.  What do you think - regulate the phone company or regulate the public?

To Spend or not to Spend

Some Betty White Super Bowl ad - I think it was
for The Voice - which I didn't watch Sunday. 

As a member of the marketing department at a company that is not the size of your standard advertisers on Super Bowl Sunday, I have a hard time understanding what it's like to be at a company which puts together an ad for the Super Bowl.  From a marketers standpoint, I have to imagine that the process is fun and it has to be exciting to see your hard work on television in a place where you know millions of people will be watching (and judging).  From a business standpoint, I find it hard to imagine that many companies can justify a $3.5 million investment for 30 seconds of air time.


As we debated this very idea at work yesterday (sorry Anub - I saved this one for places other than in the marketing department), the argument came up that it is a great conversation source for the water cooler on the Monday after the Super Bowl.  Okay, but where is the ROI?  For me, one of my favorite commercials was the Dorito's commercial where the dog buried the cat, then bribed his owner with Doritos.  Aside from that one, most of the ads either 1) annoyed me, 2) didn't appeal to me because I didn't need the product, 3) I don't remember 2 days later, or 4) all of the above.

So, let's talk about the one I did like from Doritos, seen here.  I liked the commercial, but that doesn't change the fact that Ruffles taste better than Doritos and my taste didn't magically change because I liked their ad.  But what about the social aspect, I mean, you are blogging about the Super Bowl ad, aren't you Nathan?  Why yes I am, and perhaps this added discussion will bring greater awareness to a product that otherwise might struggle.

My concern is that it seems like a Catch-22 for the usefulness of these ads.  The brands that can afford the high price tag (like Doritos, Coke, Honda, you name them) are probably large enough that the expenditure is fairly meaningless in the long run.  Maybe there is an immediate sales lift - and maybe for a company that large, the lift is even great enough to generate a large enough return that the spend is justified as Tim Arnold claims here.

The brands that I believe could benefit most from an ad on the Super Bowl - lesser known brands trying to grab our attention in a less commoditized industry - likely can't afford the massive investment. Avi Dan writes on Forbes about the many large organizations that chose not to advertise this year after airing an ad last year.

While I'd one day love to be part of the team that develops the ad that everybody loves during the Super Bowl, a part of me would have to question whether our money could be spent in a better way.  Maybe instead I'll be a part of the smaller company that puts all of its eggs in one basket, develops an ad so compelling that all of America just has to rush out and buy the product and becomes the next Apple.  In the meantime, I'll just continue to complain about the crappy Chevy commercials until someone is smart enough to do what has needed to be done for a long time and just fill all of the commercial breaks with the Bud Bowl (although I can't stand Bud beer either and won't be convinced to drink it no matter how good their ads are).

Animated Irony

For those of you that have yet to come across NMA.tv, I would guess you will see one of these videos at some point soon, so I thought I better jump aboard now.  I've watched 5 or 6 of them now and figured it was time to learn a little more about this whole phenomenon.  Unfortunately, the website doesn't provide a whole lot of information other than that the creators appear to be from Taiwan.  Beyond that, I'm really trying to figure out if they realize how ironic they are being or if they are simply taking every opportunity they can to make fun of Americans for the stupid shit we find entertaining.  I find it ironic that we are now being entertained by something that makes fun of many of the things that entertain us daily.  Speculation about the real intentions of these videos is encouraged in the comments.  In the meantime, enjoy the following video, which shows us what really happened yesterday.  And in case you were wondering, God clearly cares about football games that Tim Tebow has nothing to do with.

Super Bowl Fatigue?

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Suffering from SBF (Super Bowl Fatigue) and they haven't even kicked off.

Saw this tweet today and started thinking about all of the Super Bowl hype.  I believe I have officially found a second benefit to cutting off cable - I can't say that I'm really feeling the fatigue and I'm more excited for Super Bowl Sunday than I've been in a long time, even though I don't care much about either team.  Now, that might have something to do with the Super Bowl being two hours away or with our brilliant idea to tag team (or would Royal Rumble be more appropriate) a live blog of the Super Bowl over on 3 Fingers and a Nub tomorrow or it could be that I just haven't really seen much Super Bowl coverage.  If you are bored or have a laptop in your lap at 3:00 or later tomorrow, stop by and see what the hype is about.  And if you don't have time tomorrow, check out his blog - as Anub says - "not for the weak, the weary, children or anyone easily offended."

Back to the Super Bowl -  Here are just a few of the ridiculous articles that I have spent time reading today, which would probably just annoy me if I were able to watch ESPN or there were anything on TV besides figure skating or Secondhand Lions.

• An article about Wes Welker going to Tom Brady's house because he likes Brady's toilet.  
• Or this quiz which wants you to identify Super Bowl players by only their eyes?

Not impressed yet?  Let's keep going

• I'll give this one a cheer, and it makes me like the Giants a bit more 
• Need to see a little more skin and a little less football?  How about the photo album from the Playboy Party at the Bud Light Hotel in downtown Indy.  
• Think you know a lot about Eli Manning?  Well, did you know he "has a gift for karaoke"?

But wait, there's more!

• This one is directly targeted at the host of our Super Bowl party.  I expect Guy Fieri-approved food tomorrow.  
• And for those of you that could care less about the game and are disgusted by all the hype - here are 4 stupid ideas for how you can protest without getting in the way of the rest of us.  

I'm going to go back to browsing ridiculous Super Bowl news, watching terrible TV and getting more texts from my buddy who wasn't too lazy to drive to Indy today and is now sending me pictures like this one of AJ Green at the NFL Experience.  

Groundhog Day Spoiler

After tolerating two episodes of Greek, stuffing myself with baked chicken strips and waffle fries - this following my meals from the last 3 days of:

• Monday breakfast - Cheerios
• Monday lunch - Wendy's Asiago chicken sandwich, junior cheeseburger and medium fries
• Monday dinner - 2 frozen philly cheese steak sandwiches
• Tuesday breakfast - Cheerios
• Tuesday lunch - Portillo's breaded chicken sandwich and cheese fries
• Tuesday dinner - Pizza Hut stuffed crust bacon and mushroom pizza with breadsticks
• Wednesday breakfast - Cheerios
• Wednesday lunch - Pizza Hut meat lovers P'Zone

I don't need you to point out that this is the longest cutscene since the last episode of Family Guy, that I should clearly know why my head is fat, that I am undoing all the work I did at the gym on Monday, or that I should no longer abide by the diet I had when I swam in high school.

Best Game Show Ever

I have wasted several hours of my life in hysterics over DamnYouAutoCorrect.  You know - the site where people send in their text message conversations gone wrong thanks to the phones autocorrect feature.  Well, after hundreds of penis jokes and various texts that you have to wonder whether or not people just do it on purpose to get their convo on the web, I came across one of my all-time favorites among their top 15 tv show/movie DYAC's.  This one had to be fat-fingered quite a bit, but it's no less funny even if it was faked.

It's not exactly the conversation that makes me enjoy this one so much, it's imagining the possibilities of a show full of random screaming.  Who is the winner?  I think its the one that says something so ridiculous that the rest of the contestants can't continue.  Now that I think about it, it's not much different than a day in the War Room.  I'm picturing the show and imagining half an hour of this (not recommended for work, children, or those offended by strong language).

Toilet Humor

When I was growing up, one of my mother's biggest pet peeves was what she liked to refer to as "toilet humor".  You know, things young boys say like "you're a doo-doo head."  If I wanted to get my mouth washed out with soap, that was a sure way to get the rag (okay, okay - it was mostly just a threat, though she made good on it at least once).  Well last night, while we were dining at an "upscale" establishment on the square in Valparaiso, I paused one of our deep discussions about the guy that came in in track pants and a tshirt, the woman with shoulders on her dress that gave her a "v" shape (see below), or the reasons why born-again Christians become born-again to discuss the bathroom.

I'm sure that Snooki could lead us to a whole other realm of toilet humor, but I'm going to leave my feelings on her out of this particular post.  

You see, I was the first to make the trip to the bathroom and I found this.